BT is backkk.

So I am probably going to annoy anyone who might read this because I am going to post all my thoughts on here because I don't trust the site anymore. This is probably going to take me forever.. hum. Oh well.


- I love him so much, I hope he's not cheating on me. ='[ <3 June 3rd 2006
- I miss him greatly. <3 June 3rd 2006
- Suicide, Sometimes.. I wish I could commit. June 3rd 2006
- Nevada <3 June 5th 2006
- I love my Jarhead. June 7th 2006
- I had a dream.. He was cheating on me. It was sad. I cried. It seemed so real. =[ June 11 2006
- <> I almost got arrested yesterday. June 14th 2006
- Aha, Last night was fun. June 15th 2006
- I cant wait to get this over with. Ughhh! =|
- I just want to kill myself right now. I hate this thing called life. A life that doesn't deserve to live. *crying* ='[ I hate my mom. June 15th 2006
- xD He still loves me. <3 June 21st 2006
- He gave me a flower. ='] July 8th 2006
- I hate being depressed. I dont want to cry anymore.. August 26th 2006
- I hope I don't have it. August 28th 2006
- Should I tell my love? August 29th 2006
- Playing Cards on Gaia with my lover. ='] He's so lovely. <3 Opuk <3 August 29th 2006
- Me and Ally actually talked to eachother on phone at Jens house, on Saturday.. For like 3 hours. It was lovely. September 11, 2006 Se
- <3 I hope he's not mad, cause his mom is making him pay the phone bill. Roar at long distance.. =[ September 11, 2006 S
- Alone & Cold =| September 12, 2006 S
- Im afraid of losing him. I love him so much. September 12, 2006
- I miss him. We haven't talked since Saturday =[ 4 days.. September 13th 2006
- WE GOT CABLE!! It's been so long. x'D September 13, 2006
- As soon as I got home I just felt like crying & did.. Lately I've been holding in my tears. Just trying to ignore my feelings and pretend I'm happy.. September 14, 2006
- I dont want to pretend anymore. September 16, 2006
- 9/22/06 Bonfire - 9/23/06 Homecoming Jen doesn't want to go =[ Wish Ally could. September 16, 2006
- I hate being sick. ROAR!! Where is Jen? September 16, 2006
- Roar at Cj. She better not of. I dont even know the dude... or know how to dance with someone.. I feel so lame. September 16, 2006
- No one ever thinks about their pets Oo I love my pets <3 Racy Sylvester Evil & Liberty September 17, 2006
- I still cant beleive I'm a Senior. School goes by way to fast. '07 September 17, 2006
- Where is everyone? ='[ I'm so bored. -sit&wait- & I miss my lover.. sighhhh September 17, 2006
- I dont want to go to school. =| September 18, 2006
- Aw I love my Homecoming dress. <3 It's red. And my mom keeps singing the 'Lady in red' song -.- September 18, 2006
- Where are you? Did you move in with her? Do you like her? These questions are gradually killing me.. Please come back to me. ='[ September 18, 2006
- I can't deal with life .........right now......... ...........Going............ to sleep September 19, 2006
-Homecoming will be interesting... I'm still roaring at CJ. ROAR!@#P% -.- September 20, 2006
- Americas Next Top Model. I'm addicted to this show <3 September 20, 2006
- Dont judge a book by its cover. The cover may be better then the actual story. September 21, 2006
- I dont want to go to the homecoming any more. I dont think anyone is going =[ September 21, 2006
- I love how my thoughts are randomly colored. September 21, 2006
- Today was lots of fun hanging with Ashley. Everyone was leaving once we got at the bonfire, they had just put it out early. -.- September 23, 2006
- It felt odd having Ashley drive me home. I have never ridden in a car with someone my age driving until today. I cant wait to get my license. <3 September 23, 2006
- 80 more days till my 18th birthday. <3 Woo! September 23, 2006
- I cried in every slow song. =[ September 24, 2006
- <|3 I feel so alone. September 25, 2006
- I think about committing suicide everyday. September 26, 2006
-Yup, I do beleive he likes her. <|3 Isn't that just lovely.. ='[ September 27, 2006
- All this college shit is overwhelming me. So many things to do in so little time and still I'm not 100% sure of what I want to do with my life. Roarr!@#$ September 28, 2006
- Today some random dude at school asked me if I was single.. xD September 29, 2006
- RANDOM THOUGHT: If I have children my goal is to be the best mommy/wife ever. September 30, 2006
- I dont want winter to come. I hate the snow and coldness it brings. I want to move south. With Ally of course.. September 30, 2006
- Winter coats annoy me. Especially when shopping. October 1 2006
- I dont feel worthy of his love. I'm so lame. I've never actually had a boyfriend & dont really know what the heck I'm doing or what I should be doing. =[ October 1 2006
- Aw he sent me a lovely song. -listen to it 598 times- x'D Yup, I'm in love. October 1 2006
- I'm so glad we talked last night. October 1 2006
- I dont think Ally knows I'm basically flat chested. October 1 2006
- Wo, How is it 11 already? Oo Where is Ally? =[ I need him. & I need to sleep. October 1 2006
- I hate my gym class. I dont talk to anyone there. I played basketball all by myself. At one point I twisted my foot trying to get the ball and now it really hurts. =[ October 2 2006
- I'm Running Out Of Thoughts.. & Colors. October 3 2006
- I Love Rain <3 October 4 2006
- Yeah so I think my house is haunted.. =[ Something just touched my hip twice and nothing was there...HELP? October 4 2006
- Why are my hands always cold? =[ October 5 2006
- What time is it Mr. Fox? October 6 2006
- Lets romp. October 6 2006
- I'm addicted to drinking water <3 October 7 2006
- I really beleive that I will fail in all my dreams. My dreams are the only things that are keeping me alive. October 7 2006
- I <3 The Lion King October 7 2006
- I wonder if anyone ever reads my thoughts. Or are lame as me and read their own thoughts a million times. xD October 7 2006
- Today my dad sold his '72 Chevy Chevelle for $1800. I feel bad for him. He had it since I was born and the only thing he has left to remember his friend. October 8, 2006
- My dad is the best dad on this planet. October 8, 2006
- I should listen to this type of high energy music more often. It's fun. I want to spend night at Jennys but Matt is being mean. But it'sK!! <3 I will live. I promise. October 8, 2006
- Really missing Ally right now. ='[ I wonder if he ever thinks about me.. October 9, 2006
- I wonder if he loves me as much as he says.. Or if it's just a big lie/joke. October 9, 2006
- He's probably getting drunk and sexing 209385 girls. =| Long distance love sucks. October 9, 2006
- I feel bad for taking my dads money. But he keeps offering me it in exchange for cleaning. =| October 9, 2006
- Telling myself not to cry isn't easy. I'm trying to stay positive. October 9, 2006
- Aw, My dad cried watching the movie Click <3 October 14, 2006
- I'm too emotional. October 14, 2006
- Chillen with Jen. Listening to AFI. Glorious.. <3 October 15 2006
- No Raviolios ='[ October 15, 2006
- I love shopping. October 15 2006
- About to scream. October 15 2006
- Green is my favorite color. October 15 2006
- I can't find my glasses. School will be interesting... Ughh October 16 2006
- I know that if I ever get married I'd stay 100% faithful and I'd fight to keep us together till the very end. October 16 2006
- Sometimes when you get upset or angry it seems like your taking it out on me. It's really unfair. October 16 2006
- I want my very own happily ever after ending. October 17, 2006
- I wonder why he doesn't come on anymore to talk to me. I wonder if he forgot all about me. ='[ October 17, 2006
- 1.. You make my dreams come true.. 2.. I just want to be with you.. 3.. It is plain to see that your the only one for me. October 17, 2006
- 10/17/06 Alyssa' 15th Birthday 10/18/06 Alaynies 9th Birthday Alaynie nearly made herself blind yesterday. Happy B-day October 18, 2006
- I will never eat a banana in public ever again. October 18, 2006
- I wish I knew what you were doing. Or even what your intentions are. October 18, 2006
- I dont want to be shy anymore. October 18, 2006
- I dont want to go ice skating today. October 19, 2006
- Haha, I said Atlantic Sea. xD Woops October 19, 2006
- Weee for downloading Firefox <3 I'm having too much fun making the box lines bigger scrolling on top of them x'D October 19, 2006
- Oh yes I'm pretty freaken great. PC was seriously dead and I think I fixed it. ='] I am brilliant if I do say so myself. Though I have no idea what I did. October 20, 2006
- I want a ring. October 21
- I'm scared of turning off my computer. October 21
- I need you here. October 21
- I dont know what to think anymore. October 21
- The glass is half empty, I need more water. October 21
- My bed is calling for me. October 22
- For once Ally was on today and my dad had to ruin it by coming in here. Sup privacy. Roarr. =[ October 22
- Please come back. October 22
- I think that if I wasn't a virgin, I'd be a sex addict. October 23
- Its not fun hanging out with people who are in a bad mood when your actually for once in a good mood. October 23
- Well that definitely made my day <3 October 24
- I wish I was as pretty as Ashley. October 24
- My knight in shining armour is about 2,400 miles away. October 24
- So tired.. About to fall over and sleep. October 25
-Went ice skating today.. & I didn't fall on my ass ='] October 25
- I hope Jenny isn't angry at me for leaving yesterday to sleep. I was tired and grouchy because of gym. October 26
- I wish I had 20/20 vision. October 26
- We do some weird things. I love it. <3 BBFAE October 26
- I felt special when he came to our table to talk to me and me only. They didn't expect that. October 26
- Sigh at things. ='[[[ At least I finished goal of 4k. October 26
- Well that was a strange dream.. October 27
- $26/500 For a new computer. This is going to take awhile. October 28
- Graduation Tassel: For such a small thing it symbolizes so many things. With so much meaning & memories behind it. For endings & new beginnings. October 28
- I tend to think before I speak, I think that is why I dont talk much. I dont want to say something stupid and have people mad at me. October 28
- 'Love is like war: easy to begin, hard to end.' October 29
- We were some hot ass toilet-paper fashion queens. <3 October 29
- Oh yes. Up so late and totally falling asleep in class tommorrow. Weee & about to shower with Jen. <3 October 30
- I dont know what to freaken wear. October 30
- 42 more days until my 18th Birthday. October 30
- My butterfly hairclip broke ='[ October 31
- I can't wait to have my own kids and take them out to go trick or treating.. November 1
- Next time my mom harms me or my younger siblings, I'll get her off them & run & if she has the cops come looking for me I'll tell them everything. ='[ November 1
- I need some chocolate to satisfy my hunger for love. November 2
- This whole gang war thing going on at school is kinda scary.. I wish they'd stop. November 2
- Anyone want a brownie? November 2
- I'm getting to the point that I just dont care anymore. About anything. November 4
- I hate people who abuse animals. What gives us humans the right to be so heartless & cruel to defenseless animals?? November 5
- She's too happy & hyperactive. I find her a bit annoying. November 6
- I feel like giving up. Some dreams just aren't meant to come true. November 8
- 'You're in my head morning, noon and night.' ='] Those words will be playing over & over in my head. November 8
- I love him, I truely do. I think he may be one of the few best things that has come into my life. I can't lose him. November 8
- Today has pretty much drained me from energy. And taking a nice warm shower just makes me want to sleep even more. November 9
- I wish I knew why he wanted my number. Or if he even knew my name. November 10
- I think I might start a color scheme. Should I? November 10
- It annoys me when people treat me like alittle child. Who don't take me seriously and just walk all over me. November 10
-O0o Why are bubbles round? Ooo November 11
- Boxed thought #100,008 =] November 11
- I want to tell him. But I'm afraid of his reaction. November 11
- Zombies are the scariest things ever. Being eaten alive by dead people.. creepy. =| November 11
- Saved up $68 dollars so far for my computer and I can't keep it. Stupid holidays. November 12
- My brother is playing with my lotions and light up heels. November 12
- I should really stop wasting time on the computer. I need to actually do something with my life. November 13
- One of my worst fears is getting fat. I have nothing against fat people I just dont want myself getting overweight. November 13
- He hates emos. I just hope he wont hate me when he finds out I'm semi-emo. November 14
- I'm so confused and scared. November 14
- I can't wait to move out. November 14
- With whatever I do I disappoint her or get her pissed. I can never make her happy or proud of me. Around her I feel like a dumbass. November 14
- My fingers smell like oranges. Mmm November 15
- I'm seeing another side of him. And I dont like it. November 15
- I wish I wasn't so clueless to what' going on. Is there something I should know? November 15
- Barely holding on. November 16
- I'm disappointed in myself. November 16
- I'm home alone? Weird.. November 16
- I was actually socializing with people today.. I felt alive. November 16
- Sometimes I wish I had done more things during my freshman, sophmore, & junior years. November 17
- I like the smell of gasoline, burning paper, and wet paint. Am I weird? November 17
- Slowly we are drifting a p a r t. November 18
- This weekend will be one of the best. November 18
- As always, I'm running late. ROAR!@#&(%P@! November 18
- I can't think, I'm coloring carebears. November 19
- Jen is the greatest friend anyone could ever have <3 November 19
- Sometimes I wonder if he can read my mind. November 20
- I'm proud to be in the school I attend, the city I was born in, and the country I belong to. Even if they have their defaults. November 21
- Senior Skip Day & I'm at school.. November 21
- I'm dirt poor. November 22
- TOP SECRET: Shshsh!! I want to take part in some rough sex, like right now. Roar. November 23
- ='[ My parents think my little brother has Cancer. He has 2 hard, strange bumps on his neck.. There going to take him to the hospital to get checked after dinner. November 24
- I never have money for Black Friday shopping. November 24
- My kitty snores. November 25
- I hate how my mom is so racist and judgemental. November 25
- Humans should be more like Penguins. November 25
- About to pee myself because my family are a bunch of assholes and locked me in the basement... November 26
- 18th Birthday Count Down: 15 days, 9 hours, 56 minutes, & 30 seconds. November 26
- There' no better place to sleep then in your own bed. November 26
- When I watch couples on tv doing cute things I imagine us doing them. November 26
- Get better little Sunshine. November 27
- Mmm.. Gummy bears. November 28
- Sometimes when I cross a street I wish that there would be a car I didn't see run over me. November 28
- I am bad luck to myself. I burnt my finger =[ November 29
- I'm sick of being my parents slave. November 29
- I have a presentation today. I hate talking in front of people.. I'm shaking right now just thinking about it. =[ November 30
- Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new. November 30
- I'm pathetic. November 30
- Patiently waiting for you to come back to me. December 1
- Hiccups are so annoying. December 1
- Thanks for ditching me. December 1
- I waited for you for 18 minutes. =| Saw you with her and then left. December 1
- I wish I had a crystal ball to see what my future witholds. Is it worth living for? December 2
- My sister is evil. December 3
- I feel as if I'm forgotten by the one I love most. December 3
- I wonder if he'll remember my birthday. December 3
- Yay for two hour delays. December 4
- I don't think I can do this anymore. December 4
- I feel like a complete idiot thinking he cared. He must not care that much about me if he doesn't make any attempt to talk to me. Sigh. December 4
- Crying helps me release everything that hurts. I cried but now I'm okay. If he doesn't care nor do I. December 4
- I like to cry in bed. December 5
- My kitty likes to steal my chair. December 5
- It's weird how like everything about someone and what makes them who they are can be 'cured' with medication. December 5
- The only good thing that comes from snow is snow days & making naked trees look pretty. December 5
- Guys in uniforms are hot. December 5
- I hope it's not too late. December 6
- All I'm thinking about is trying to think of something to put in this thought box. Oo December 6
- I wish I could stay in bed forever. December 7
- I think that if I really wanted to commit suicide I'd join the army. I'd rather die for my country then just kill myself senselessly. December 7
- I feel like I live in a snowglobe.December 7
- Do you care for what's on my mind? December 8
- I pretend that I'm interested in this boring class so I wont fall asleep. December 8
- I think we both know this isn't going to work. December 8
- I think if we can make it through this we can make it through anything. December 9
- 'I do understand, don't worry.' 'I'll wait until you're ready' You don't know how much those words mean to me. December 9
- We can be hopeless romantics together. December 9
- I wish I could shower with Ally. December 9
- Movie night with Jen. And fag dancing on cam with suffocation. December 9
- I can't think, I'm coloring Hello Kitty. December 10
- Jen won't let me sleep. December 10
- I never noticed how much my younger siblings have impacted my life and how much I've impacted theirs. I will miss them when I move away. December 11
- Some of my thoughts are contradicting. December 11
- Aw, Our chemistry class pet, rat thing died. =[ December 11
- I'm going to be sad if Ashley doesn't decorate my locker for my birthday. December 11
- My birthday is tommorrow. December 11
- Happy Birthday To Me! December 12
- I got a dozen pink roses for my birthday ='] Now I have to bring them to all my classes. December 12
- Ashley better like her locker tommorrow because I spent all my birthday money for it & I missed my call from Ally =[ And Alyssa killed my computer. December 13
- I'm getting so frustrated with school.. So many projects to do. I'm going insane. & I feel like crying. December 13
- I blew out all 18 candles.. Now I'm just waiting for my wish to come true. December 14
- I enjoy talking to him on the phone. December 15
- I'm lost without my computer =[ December 15
- Yay, I finally got it to work.. December 18
- Our Christmas Tree looks like a huge, fat Hershey Kiss. December 18
-I wish he loved me as much as I love him. December 18
-WARNING: This Tag must be Removed by the Store. Injury from permanent ink & Glass will result if forced off -.- American Eagle -.- fuckers forgot to take security tag off.. December 18
- I love feeling pretty. December 19
- I love new clothes. December 19
- I need constant reasurrance. December 19
- 'What' up beautiful?' I never thought I would hear that from him Oo.. I needed that boost of confidence, thanks. December 20
- I hate my life. December 20
- We are having some serious Global Warming & it scares me. Where are you dumb snow? December 21
- I think we'll be having a green Christmas this year, here in New York... December 21
- Went to the Library with Jen for independent reading. I think I will enjoy this book. Bad Kitty
by Michele Jaffe. December 21
- Bringing Frosted Animal Cookies for Christmas Party in Economics. Everyone will love them.
- Woo for free stuff. December 22
- My kitty is resting on my arm. I hope she's okay. She can't jump well. I don't know if she's just too fat and lazy, pregnant or hurting. December 22
- This tunnel has no light at the end. It only gets darker. December 22
- No one needs me. I have no reason to live. December 22
- Where are you Ally? December 23
- I'm starting to dislike holidays more and more. They cause too many troubles. December 23
- I miss being a child & believing in Santa. I miss the exciting, magical, cheerful, mysterious feeling. December 24
- I suck at gift wrapping... December 24
- At least we got frost. I think that not having snow ruined Christmas spirit. Merry Christmas! December 25
- 'You're mean for making me hurry my pee-ness' LOL, Woops. December 26
- Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the lord my soul to be the next you take. December 27
- I'm a failure. December 27
- Help me escape my hell. December 27
- Nothing good lasts. December 28
- He makes all my worries go away. December 28
- My mom said my legs are getting thick. I must run. December 28
- I love my fuzzy green slippers. December 28
- Aslan is a lovely looking lion. December 29
- I can't sleep, Ally is here. December 29
- I am so dead and I am still awake trying to speak to my lover, though I am barely able to stay alive. December 29
- Yay Ally, I'm in love. December 29
- Ally left us and I am sad. December 29
- Just hearing his voice makes me smile. December 29
- I can't wait to have children & be a mommy. December 30
- Should I be worried? December 30
- All I want is to be in your arms. December 30
- My computer hates me. December 31